I am an intelligent and articulate dog, so I have honed my observations down to a Top Ten list:
1. Ticks SUCK!! The time around Millbrook, NY was the worst! Mom and Dad took at least a dozen a day off me! I couldn't even go for a walk in the woods... when I went to the bathroom off the main road, they found me! Bloodsuckers!!
2. We'll be back. That's what they always say when they leave me in the van. I know they take me for lots of walks and stuff, and I don't really mind the van cause it smells like me now, but mostly at night they leave me and say, "We'll be back, Tankers." And they do come back...
3. Treats are good! Usually they give me treats when they leave me in the van, or when they have to pick ticks off my head. I really don't mind. I kinda work their guilt in my favor. Treats are good!!
4. New smells!!! OMG!! I am a midwestern dog, born and raised... and I am smelling stuff I never could have imagined! Ocean smells, new plants and foods, and not even to mention all the dog pee I have smelled on bushes and posts. OMG!! New smells, baby!
5. Heat in a fur coat! My bioclock tells me it's time for the white stuff. I am growing a longer coat so that I can roll in the snow and chase my ball... but there is no white stuff. As a matter of fact my biocompass tells me that they continue to drive farther south... WTF!?!?! Luckily, Dad shaved me the other day. That feels better, but you know what? I LIKE SNOW!! I'm not sure what's going on here...
6. They are with me all the time now!! You know, that's all I ever wanted. When they had jobs, they used to leave me alone for up to 8 hours. Not that it was really bad or anything, I liked the house, they fed me well, and it was great napping, but damn it got lonely. Now I'm not sure what's going on, but they don't seem to have jobs anymore, and I AM WITH THEM ALL DAY LONG!! I am a happy doggie!! Woof woof!!!
7. Retirement is a good thing! I'm not really sure what retirement means, cause I don't even know what a job is... I mean, what's a job? My "job" is being a dog, and I do it all day long. Isn't your job to be a human?? I mean, what else is there? I guess you could break it down into subskills like sniffing bushes, chasing a ball, loving your master and stuff like that, but it's not rokket science, folks. Anyway, they seem to talk about "retirement" a lot and it always seems to make them happy, so I'm all for it. Ain't nobody happy if momma and papa ain't happy. That's a dog's basic credo.
8. How's my tail! This may not seem to be a big deal to you humans, cause you basically don't have tails, but to a dog it's a big deal. And mine has seen better days. You know that David Crosby song about letting his freak flag fly? Almost cut my hair today??? Well, somehow I've lost contact with my tail, got some burrs in it, got some tangles and stuff. Mom cut the heck out of it the other week. I'm kinda over it, but it's not the same. Just sayin.
9. Serenity. Every day a different road or place or smells... I love being with them, and they seem to enjoy my company too. I love those people, and I love how much they love each other...
10. Ticks suck! I hate to repeat myself, but those little crappers really bug me!! You know I used to hate mosquitoes just as much, but then Jim told me that a mosquito larva can filter a quart of pond water each day, so I figured ok they put their shoulder to the wheel. Big or small, we all have a part in the Big Wheel... but ticks SUCK! Literally!
OOPS...I FORGOT ONE OF MY MOST FUN THINGS TO DO!!!!!! AND IN THIS BIG, BIG, BIG POOL OF WATER CALLED AN OCEAN!!!! AND THIS IS THE COLOR IT IS IN FLORIDA! (But you can't see it in this picture.)
And I really like the way it tastes...kinda salty...
but it gives me the squirts if I drink too much!
Oh yeah...and every time I go to the ocean I always seem to charm the little girls. :) They throw the ball and play with me until it's time to go home.
but it gives me the squirts if I drink too much!
Love to you all!! Tanker
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